3 Mishaps and Derek to My Rescue

By Aaron Hu

Sometimes I wonder just how I am ever going to get through all of our wedding preparations let alone our actual wedding day. The last several days it seems like most everything I do or our wedding planner does slides down the slippery slope and causes us more and more frustration and re-doing. I keep asking myself, "why me ..." over and over ... and guess what ... I don't have an answer.

Our wedding planner was constantly telling me not to worry. It will all work out, you'll see. Well, how can you tell a bride-in-waiting not to worry. Worrying is probably inherent in all engaged women. I can't speak for their male counterparts, but for us ... take it from me ... it's in our nature. There's no escaping it. The good news about it though is that with all the second guessing, questioning, complications, and on and on ... we manage and usually do so very well in the end. I think more often than not we subconsciously create some of our own obstacles maybe out of fear, uncertainty ... all that and then some. And why not, we are planning, be it with or without a professional planner, the most glorious day of our life and the future it holds for us.

Worry ... why should I be worried if the printer made a typo on our invitations? Not just any forgivable typo ... they put in the wrong day. Why should I be worried if the caterer we hired sent me a suggested menu that was anything but what we had discussed when we met? Why should I be worried if my wedding dress, which I had designed, would only be finished the day before my wedding? And that is only one day's worth of "don't worry" slip-ups. Was I being too testy, too tightly wound, just too too? I needed a truly good bar of rich truffeled chocolate; and that was another thing the caterer neglected to put on the desert menu ... lightly whipped chocolate parfait with ever-so tiny bits of chocolate and nougat with a sprinkling of crushed walnuts.

Fortunately the doorbell rang and I got distracted from my worry thoughts. It was Derek, my fiance. He knew every nuanced look on my face and knew what to do about it. His eyes twinkled, he smiled slightly, and I simply melted into his open arms. I silently prayed that this was what it would always be like, especially when I felt like I was floundering and momentarily insecure.

We went into the family room, sat down, and I started rambling on about what was happening. He listened patiently; made himself look concerned, sighed with me, held my hand, and stoically let me rant on until I ran out of breath. Gradually we talked about all the mishaps of my day, and he finessed his reasoning as to how I might/should deal with what happened and how he knew I could and would take advantage of the mistakes and make them work in my favor.

He was right, of course. I wasn't thrilled with the print style of the invitation so it was the perfect opportunity to have it changed. I had thought about some changes in the menu but didn't want the caterer to think I was being indecisive and constantly nagging him. Now I could with subtlety and right on my side, tell him that I wanted a somewhat new menu. And my dress ... I decided I wanted a sheer veil with baby pearls so that would justify the emotional delay for me.

I felt better. And on top of all that, I finally thought of the wedding favors I would have. They would be fun and unique ones. I was going to have a one and a half inch parfait glass filled with baby glass pearls for the women and an equal sized satin top hat and slightly smaller glass cane attached to it for the men. Different, don't you think?

I was getting over the stress of the day, and I would sleep well tonight, thanks to Derek and my creative thinking.

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